Kebiasaan orang bule vs. Kebiasaan orang Asia (part 2)

6. Week-ends on the Road



B: Menikmati week-end with his own way
R: Doyan ke tempat2 ramai, mall, etc...




7. Party



B: Bebas-bebas aja berkelompok dengan group-nya sendiri
R: Semua fokus ke satu acara party yang di arrange EO



8. In the Restaurant



B: Ngobrol pelan2 di resto
R: Ribut ngobrol keras2 dan ketawa-ketiwi, gak peduli meja sebelah



9. Travelling


B: Demen sight-seeing
R: Yang penting foto2 untuk memory dan dijadiin bukti, pemandangan cuma jadi background doang.




10. Handling problems



B: Tabrak aja, yang penting solve the problem
R: Sebisa mungkin menghindari masalah or kalo bisa jangan sampek ninggalin jejak

A letter for Sarah

This following posting is inspired from a true story:

Andiman pemuda asli Indonesia yg lugu, bermaksud memutuskan hubungan dengan kekasihnya bernama Sarah, seorang gadis asal Amerika. Selama ini mereka berhubungan dgn bahasa alakadarnya, yg penting mereka berdua bisa mengerti maksudnya.

Untuk memutuskan hubungan, Andiman tak sanggup jika harus bertemu muka dengan kekasihnya tersebut.

Andiman ingin menulis surat dalam bahasa Inggris, walaupun ilmu bahasa Inggris nya sangat minim, tetapi merasa optimis dengan berbekal kamus tebal serta sedikit info yang dia pernah dengar selama ini.

Isi suratnya sebagai berikut :

Hi Sarah, with this letter I want to give know you

(hai Sarah bersama surat ini saya ingin memberitahu kamu)

I WANT TO CUT CONNECTION US

(SAYA INGIN MEMUTUSKAN HUBUNGAN KITA)

I have think this very cook cook

(saya telah memikirkan hal ini masak masak)

I know my love only clap half hand

(saya tahu cinta saya hanya bertepuk sebelah tangan)

Correctly, I have see you go with a man rich at town with my eyes & head myself

(sebenarnya, saya telah melihat kamu pergi bersama seorang pria kaya di kota dengan mata kepala saya sendiri)

You always ask apology back back times

(kamu selalu minta maaf berulang ulang kali)

You eyes drop tears crocodile

(matamu mencucurkan airmata buaya)

You correct correct a woman eyes money

(kamu benar-benar seorang wanita mata duitan)

My friend speak you play fire

(teman saya bilang kamu bermain api)

Now I know you correct correct play fire

(sekarang saya tahu kamu benar benar bermain api)

So, I break connection and pull body from love triangle this

(jadi, saya putuskan hubungan dan menarik diri dari cinta segitiga ini)

I know result I pick this very correct, because you love he very big from me (saya tahu keputusan yang saya ambil ini benar, karena kamu mencintai dia lebih besar dari saya)

But I still will not go far far from here

(namun saya tetap tidak akan pergi jauh-jauh dari sini)

I don't want you play play with my liver

(saya tidak ingin kamu main-main dengan hati saya)

I have been crying night night until no more eye water thinking about your body
(saya menangis bermalam-malam sampai tidak ada lagi airmata memikirkan dirimu)

I don't want to sick my liver for two times

(saya tidak mau sakit hati untuk kedua kalinya)

Safe walk, Sarah (selamat jalan, Sarah)

Boy friend of your liver (kekasih hatimu),

Andiman..

Note:

this river I forgive you, next river I kill you !

(kali ini aku maafkan kamu, kali lain kubunuh kau !)

If you give a dictionary to angry workers...

Maybe Andiman was part of the demonstraters?

Going Green!!!

Possible alternative fuel ideas for Jakarta commuters?

Kebiasaan orang bule vs. Kebiasaan orang Asia (part 1)

BLUE: Westerner
RED: Asian

1. Opinion


B : Langsung to the point
R : Blunder muter2 dulu, apalagi kalo opini berbeda paham




2. Punctuality



B : On Time
R : In Time




3. Contacts



B : Contact to related persons only
R : Semua temen, semua sodara, relasi luas, bisnis lancar!




4. Anger



B : Marah ya marah
R : Marah ya ramah




5. Queue when waiting


B : Biasa antri teratur
R : Rebutan dong, siapa cepat dapet lah

A question of Logic..

Mathematics need logic.. Logically, are these wrong??

When you have drugs...

...the government advises:

Effect of Global Warning

The inverse correlation between higher temperatures and underwear sizes.

Lessons in logic

If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
it's your stupidity.

I was born intelligent -
education ruined me.


Practice makes perfect.....
But nobody's perfect......
so why practice?

Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Money is not everything.
There's Mastercard & Visa.

Every woman should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in
life.

The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become otherwise.

Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.

"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep

There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning

"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk

The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn.


A bus station is where a bus stops.

A train station is where a train stops.

On my desk, I have a work station....
what more can I say........

Can you read this?

fi yuo cna
raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid, too.
Cna yuo raed tihs?
Olny 55 plepoe tuo fo 100
anc.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig
to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the
ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat
ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll
raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey
lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas
tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad it.



If you can
read this, your brain is 50% faster than those who can't

How to hug a baby... from a dog's point of view

First, um, find a baby


Second, be sure that the object you found was indeed a baby by employing classic sniffing techniques

Next, you will need to flatten the baby before actually beginning the hugging process

The "paw slide": Simply slide paws around baby and prepare for possible close-up

Finally, if a camera is present, you will need to execute the difficult and patented ‘hug, smile, and lean’ so as to achieve the best photo quality

So, who should we praise..?

The Lord or The Load ??!

Weather = Waitress..?

Want work so weather ? (Mau bekerja jadi cuaca ?) *Andiman's style*

What will I be when I grow up?

Before and after marriage

Before Marriage

He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.

She: Do you want me to leave?

He: NO! Don't even think about it.

She: Do you love me?

He: Of course! Over and over!

She: Have you ever cheated on me?

He: NO! Why are you even asking?

She: Will you kiss me?

He: Every chance I get!

She: Will you hit me?

He: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!

She: Can I trust you?

He: Yes.

She: Darling!

After marriage...

Simply read from bottom to top.

Marriage

WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede
their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied,
"in-laws."


WORDS
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day..

30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"


CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so
beautiful all at the same time.
"The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.

God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you !


WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.

The husband said, "You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it! , because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."

Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee." Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of
several pages, that! it indeed says .......... "HEBREWS"


The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him
at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. !
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on
a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM ."
He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was
about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, "It is 5:0 0 AM. Wake up."
Men are not equipped forthese kinds of contests.


God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece

Pictures taken at just the right angle

There's a little bit of Tukul in us all

Days of our lives

Lost in Translation

Suatu hari ada bule kehilangan sepeda motornya yg dia parkir didepan toko di sekitar jalan
Malioboro, Yogya. Lalu dia bertanya ke Paijo, yg saat itu kebetulan berada di tempat parkir, apakah dia ngeliat org yg ngambil sepeda motornya.

Paijo: "Yes, he use to table square-square. Worth he fast-fast go without any wet expire."
(Iya, dia pakai ke-meja kotak-kotak. Pantes dia cepat-cepat pergi tanpa basa basi).

Lalu dengan sok berwibawa Paijo menasehati si bule tadi : "Sir, different river, if park bicycle motor liver- liver, yes?"
(Tuan, lain kali kalo parkir sepeda motor hati- hati ya?").
Si bule itu diam saja karena nggak tau mau jawab apa, sehingga Paijo jadi ngedumel, "Basic bule!"
("Dasar bule!")

Karena tambah nggak tau harus ngomong apa lagi, si bule trus ngeloyor pergi, dan dengan PD-
nya Paijo bilang, "Breasttttt!" sambil melambaikan tangannya.
Maksudnya: "Dadaaaaa"............

Education in indonesia... Pffftt...

How good is the education in Indonesia?
Better check this info out. Again, just for a reminder, not all the information you may find in this are correct.

Quote from Uncyclopedia about Indonesia:

Education

Tawuran

Fundamental exercises in Tawuran.

Tawuran, is a modernized martial art developed in 1970 by the Ministry of Education for the purpose of enhancing the physical fitness of Indonesian youth. Tawuran is mostly based on the ancient Indonesian martial art, Kerusuhan (lit. "Riot"), developed by Java Man, the first king of Indonesia. Exercises in Tawuran involve running, intimidation tactics, coordinated rock-throwing, and self-immolation. It's difficult to find qualified Tawuran instructors due to the self-immolation thing.

Demonstrations

Starting at age 12, all Indonesian students are required to participate in demonstrations and protests, usually on a weekly basis. By the end of high school, students have participated in demonstrations or protests for and/or against almost any imaginable issue or non-issue. Students are expected to demonstrate or protest as ordered, even against themselves. It is not uncommon for students to carry signs with messages such as "Down With Me" or "Students Suck". By college-age, many students have actually attacked themselves and administered self-beatings or had hunger strikes against themselves or even against food itself.

Indonesian Student Code of Conduct

• Honor corruption by cheating on all tests, even if you actually know the answers
• Flatter the teacher by offering them oral sex
• Show a spirit of cooperation by coordinating cheating in exams and after-school orgies
• Participate in Demonstrations and Strikes at least once per week

How to Succeed in Indonesian Classes

• Staple a 50,000 Rupiah note (US$5) to your assignment before handing in.
• Staple a 100,0000 Rupiah note to submitted assignments (some teachers are getting very strict now).
• Lift (female students) skirt to (male) teachers before handing in assignments.

Uncyclopedia...

Ever heard of encyclopedia? Sure you did! Those are huge dictionaries with lots of pages and it gives lots of information about any word you're searching for. They are very trustful to begin with since the information found in it are all facts.

How about Uncyclopedia?? Ever heard about it? It is a parody of encyclopedia in which we can found in the internet. Quoting from Wikipedia.org:

"English-language wiki, the project currently spans over 50 languages. The English version has over 24,000 pages of content.^[2]

Various different styles of humour are used as a vehicle for parody, from sophisticated satire to the apparently random. Like Wikipedia, Uncyclopedia has guidelines regarding what is and is not acceptable content and these guidelines have become progressively more strict as the site expands over time. The site has gained media attention due to its articles on places and people."

Whenever you're bored, you can always check this website called Uncyclopedia in http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/ BUT always remember that the information in it may not be acceptable for some society. So be careful while reading it.

Please enjoy. ^_^

Introduction to our blog

Hey Guys,

Welcome to our blog called Astaga Dragon, made by Inge, Jessica, Vasnia and Tarita, 4th semester students of Communication & Public Relations of SGU (Swiss German University).

The objective of this blog is to inform everybody in the form of entertainment.
As you see, our blog is called Astaga Dragon which is literally translated from bahasa Indonesia Astaganaga. So basically our blog will be filled with direct translation which are done incorrectly from one language to another language.
As the result, please read our post and enjoy! ^_^